poet russ cavanagh

don't let your childhood define you. hard, i know. what wasn't your fault wasn't your fault. try to let it go. we're here to learn, to fail, to get up again. don't let your childhood define you. let Jesus lift your pain.     CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh 2 Corinthians 5:17 - KJV

subdued ambience spatters my window under an overcast sky 21:25 and Brahms plays on a radio bought elsewhere by a much younger man now long lost to me those others met along the way who like me too took their solitude neat oh it's the wait that I can't stand   CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh Romans 12:12 - KJV 

ink over paper dots on screens 0 in this w0rld is quite what it screams   CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh John 17:15 - KJV

   A child when last we spoke, your middle age now nears still silent to me.   I think of you most days, particularly in this cold darkness. Poison certainly was her preferred choice. CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh Romans 12:19 - KJV

One special day we stood together alone on Cromer Beach, where December sun bathed skin stung by wind from a familiar bloody sea. Side of fresh salmon - Kir Royale the apéritif - stylish in every respect - waiting back at the cottage to bless another occasion of friendship thicker than water. Yet in many years to follow, neither card nor present exchanged; for now beyond reach, I know not how to find you. (for Keith)       CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh Psalm 34:18 - KJV

there's only one sun there's only one moon and under each everything was done by snakes busy busy with whispered spell so your eyes never open so your eyes only dream for in laced sleep you will not see never know what was taken was you       CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh Revelation 12:9 - KJV

jenni the weepy sheep would cry herself to sleep because she lived up a hill where her side was too steep every day she would hope for a somewhat gentler slope as all her poorly knees really couldn't cope  the strain was quite enough to make her huff and puff and after several months she really felt quite rough  then one day from afar came the farmer in his car he shouted, "come now jenni, time for the abattoir."     CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh

another early morning my unease lifts  slow wisps of thought across unlit walls mask dark cities unfinished repairing to another dawn as a lone car hisses past outside in prelude to the coming opera itself a minor variation on a set theme where vanity vies for attention with ego ...fried or boiled ...or coddled ...or poached good morning     CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh  

each episode plays out across the street as loud young braves in short-sleeved shirts enact rites of passage for prospective lovers (un)suitably in uniform in yet another evening in another velvet autumn in another distant town alone in my unlit room squeezing the last from a cheap red not stopping to wonder what became of us our symphony played out the stage finale dismantled but the truth my loveliness is quite simply that you should never have fu*king told her     CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh Proverbs 6:32-33 - KJV

I found out how Adam felt gifted with such natural pleasure! Warm rain on my bare back as you took me inside out in the wild. Remember smiling hello to that old birdwatcher who appeared, panting and ruddy, even as we closed our very last button? Does he ever frown, I wonder, back upon that day? And what about you? My Eve?     CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh

Train to the city today for a rare fix of business. At an original Italian cafe in an aptly traditional quarter, fish teas are served onto modest tables for a very reasonable price. The food was good, as always, while the coffee didn't disappoint. Imperfect people ate around me; patrons each finding time out from some daily toil or eternal turmoil most likely more real than otherwise. Autumn sunlight spilled through large windows televising pavement scenes - actions playing live without end. From a radio, Bob Marley wailed "let's get together and feel all right". Hunger now abated, making ready for the off, I echoed my host's warm farewell and echoed his gratitude. Appearing to meet me at the door, my own reflection gave confirmation that I'm not so very different.       CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh John 13:34 - KJV

key right round double-click the door exit the stair and outside i go turn right for trouble left holds more hope avoiding that guy stood smoking dope cross over junction smile past two cops then quickly round a few of the shops run into church ladies who'd test my wit or more like hoping to roast me on a spit dodging around avoiding strange looks soon i’m back home with bread cheese and books my privacy button is first thing i press when living alone with no unwanted guests     CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh Psalm 1:1 - KJV

Tony couldn’t play pedal steel but he was a policeman who checked permits others required back then A wandering Spanish cock despite beautiful wife and home he revelled in the glamour of our music-making He’d disappear after gigs for a private performance with some lucky tourist sweating under his spell A pleasant yet despicable man I still think about his wife   CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh Matthew 5:27-28 - KJV 

i often sit thinking atop the stairs drawing on a rolled cigarette tonight a door hangs open despite this disappointing summer my light streams out from a bathroom as a cheap red awaits in an untidy room oh I fixed the stair light eventually but habit can be such a powerful thing    CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh

A to E to B to F# (a.k.a. Gb ) to C# (a.k.a. Db ) to G# (a.k.a. Ab ) to D# (a.k.a. Eb ) to A# (a.k.a. Bb ) to F to C to G to D and then back to A(men)     CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh

Cruising the reds I encountered a lady holding a bottle whilst clearly undecided over what would be her Friday night second. I suggested a current choix of mine, a quality quaff of Merlot discounted to a fiver. Expressing gratitude she went with my suggestion. The sample already in her grip was, she declared with haught, a favourite of her husband's and came in at "... £19 a bottle". "You did well to marry him," I could only reply.   CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh Hebrews 13:5 - KJV

I'm sat on a chair at a folding table in a near empty flat this autumn night, typing into a laptop and waiting to move what little furniture I have left. In my head just now I counted nineteen - a lifetime spanning three times as many years - discounting a couple of places I lived in a mere few months. Running on empty, like waking alone in an unfamiliar bed.    CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh 1 Corinthians 3:16 - KJV

I peered at a word sprayed in bright red where cobble met tarmac; couldn’t read what it said.  Butcher, baker, locksmith: all looked most perplexed to view such garish writing - this strange, elusive text.  One by one the public on bended knee they went; but none of us could figure just what the pavement.         CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh  

He told class how he'd put his dead cat on a tin tray wired to the electric. The idea was to jump-start it into the next of nine lives. Vets were unheard of among us poorer folks way back then. But not, apparently, Mary Shelley.   CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh

i stood before myself as a child sat apart not fully connected but not entirely without awareness of self i felt delight again wondering innocent upon each discovery punctuating aloneness in a way back when this child's neglect remained unwritten how stained and worn we become through time shaped by episodes and scars forgotten CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh John 3:3-17 - KJV

I drove the truck into my suburbia to get more beers. Sat patiently at an empty junction in the night, I waited for the light to turn from green to red. Ah! Stoned again   CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh Ephesians 5:18 - KJV

It’s not a way out she wants but a snug cul-de-sac in which to consummate her unhappiness, and my loneliness.  Achieving what? An illicit distraction for her, before parting too soon, perhaps again and again, as and when?  Me left alone with a trace still warm, still fragrant, in this place that is not her marriage bed     CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh Proverbs 6:32-33 - KJV

... the sunday 09:05 collects its first congregation with heads hung over not so smart screens doling out dopamine desires from a thick wifi soup in this irradiated tin can aimed approximately at a city where i will meet: the catholic mother grieving her dead child; the pugilistic vishnu draped in poverty, wrapped in wrath; the road sweeper who will confide incredible conspiracies to anyone with ears to hear; the stooped grey gent inclined towards misunderstanding; the addicted youth with tears of blood in her eyes ... -each falling short of the grand illusion- ... and the woman who said, "I was saved by someone like you" I will add these testimonies to others shared quietly on that city's street where later a final chariot will conduct its evening service to drive me back home at the end of another blessed day     CC BY-ND 4.0 - Russell Cavanagh Mark 16:15 - KJV